We turn coffee into code, and code into client’s profits since 2009.
Basically alchemy, but with better ROI.
Let’s talk about your problems, how to use them on Tinder, and other useful things.
(We’re still working on turning code back into coffee. We’ll keep you posted.)
The Value Proposition Nobody Asked For But Everyone Needs
One peculiar thing about modern business is the inverse relationship between the amount of software installed and the clarity of answers obtained. Companies somehow end up with seventeen different systems that don’t talk to each other, generating reports that answer questions nobody asked while ignoring the only two that matter: where are we losing money, and where could we be making more?
You’re probably here because:
- Your company has more financial reports than employees, yet somehow less clarity
- Every department head insists they’re wildly profitable (while your bank account is crying every day)
- Your ERP system has a user manual longer than the Dodd-Frank Act
- You’ve built a thriving ecosystem of non-communicating software applications that would make biodiversity researchers proud
The Experience Section
Here’s the fundamental problem with the ERP and accounting software landscape: it was built by people who have never sweated over making payroll or explained a bad quarter to investors. They were solving the wrong problems. “Look, we can generate tons of impressive charts!” they proclaim, while CEOs quietly wonder why none of those charts answer the question “Where is my money going?”
The disconnect is practically a law of nature. Most software is written by people who’ve never run the businesses they’re writing for.
Since 2009, we’ve been doing something peculiar: making financial software that actually makes sense. We started with mom-and-pop shops and now serve companies with market caps that would make a decent SPAC acquisition. Actually talking to entrepreneurs—thousands of brutally honest conversations about their daily struggles, late-night anxieties, and the information they desperately need but can’t extract from their expensive software. While Silicon Valley was busy creating apps that help you share photos of your lunch, we were building algorithms that help you afford lunch in the first place.
From our Dubai headquarters, we blend Middle Eastern business acumen with Silicon Valley innovation approaches. Imagine if Sheikh Zayed and Steve Jobs had a tech baby with a finance degree. That’s essentially us, but with a better understanding of your balance sheet and considerably less turtleneck sweaters.
Worst Practices (A Field Guide)
Over time, we’ve noticed some recurring errors in business operations that would make any financial analyst cringe:
- Time isn’t on the balance sheet—though it’s often your scarcest resource (and unlike money, you can’t raise more of it in a Series B)
- Profit calculations that would make Enron’s accountants nervous—departments show profits while the company loses money, a mathematical impossibility that somehow persists
- Internal transfer pricing that would confuse a tax haven specialist—making it impossible to know which business units are subsidizing others
- Forecasts based on historical data—like driving forward while looking exclusively in the rearview mirror
- When problems arise, no one knows how to respond (so they just keep losing money)—like watching a slow-motion train wreck while the conductor debates which button to press
Looks familiar, right? The good news is that these problems are so universal you can use them as a conversation starter on Tinder. (“So, how many times does your paper profit in board reports exceed your actual profit?” works surprisingly well.)
The even better news is that solutions exist. And not just any solutions—ones that don’t require a PhD in financial engineering or the patience of a central bank regulator.
The Value Proposition (Our Term Sheet)
We don’t just think outside the box. We securitize the box, optimize its cash flows, and then distribute the returns to stakeholders. Our approach:
- Profit forensics—we find where money goes to die in your organization, like a financial CSI team
- Margin automation—because profitable processes should run themselves, like a well-structured perpetuity
- Real-time decision support—giving executives the information equivalent of insider trading, except it’s legal and about their own company
If you’re looking for software that’s powerful enough to run a hedge fund but simple enough that you won’t need to hire quants to operate it, you’ve found it.
Welcome to the future of business software. It’s sophisticated yet approachable, like a financial model that doesn’t require sixteen tabs of assumptions to make sense.
Would you like to start generating alpha through better information? Or would you prefer to continue with your current approach, which has roughly the same expected return as a savings account in an inflationary environment? (That’s what we in finance call a “leading question.”)